Communication

Frequently at school I find myself answering students' questions about slang.  They hear words at work, on TV and on the street that they don't understand.  Our conversations are sometimes quite explicit.  But, my students are all aged 18 and older; and, I believe that for their own self preservation there are things that they need to understand.  We discuss words and phrases that are okay to use with friends and co-workers, but not with a boss or teacher.  We talk about words that have multiple definitions.  Today we covered words that are okay to use when describing an attractive guy or girl, but that should never be used to describe Grandma.  I think it's fine to have these discussions within the shelter of my classroom.  But, I didn't expect to be having such a discussion with my children. 

I arrived home, anticipating a semi-quiet evening.  It was "Buddy Nite" at the Taekwondo Studio, and Les had promised to take both girls.  Semi-quiet was right.  The girls were sprawled in front of the TV eating buttered popcorn.  They ran to greet me and here's what transpired:

Cassie:  Mom!!!  I got a postcard from the principal saying congratulations for my good grades.  And, you'll never guess what!!!  Lacey said "dammit" on the bus!!!!

Me to Les:  Have you already discussed this?

Les:  No.  Haven't had time.

Me to Myself:  (Of course you haven't.)

Me to Lacey:  Did you say dammit?

Lacey:  Yes

Me:  Why did you say dammit?

Lacey:  I say dammit because I have homework and Sydney doesn't!

Cassie:  She knows it's a bad word.  She told Sydney not to tell me!

Me:  (Struggling to keep a straight face.)  So, why do you say dammit, Lacey?

Lacey:  Because other people do.  I hear other people say it.

Me:  (Scowling at Les)  I told you not to let her watch so much TV.

Me to Myself:  I don't think they say "dammit" on the Disney Channel.

Me to Lacey:  If other people do bad things does that make it okay for you to be bad?

Lacey:  (Licking butter from her fingers)  No.

Me:  Then, is it okay for you to say "dammit."

Lacey:  I don't know.

Me:  Well, dammit, "dammit" isn't a nice word.  Remember how we keep talking about using your middle finger?

Lacey:  Uh huh.

Me:  Well, saying "dammit" is sort of like using your middle finger.  It's not nice.

Lacey:  (Continuing to lick her fingers while looking longingly at the TV in the next room.)  Uh huh.

Me:  Are you going to say "dammit" anymore?

Lacey:  I don't know.

Me:  Uhhh. . . . If the teacher hears you say "dammit," she'll send you to the principal's office.

Lacey:  Will I get a postcard from the principal like Cassie did?

Me:  No!! 

Cassie:  Mommy.  Remember when Lacey said "H E double hockey sticks?"

Me to Myself:  If I didn't, you'd make sure I would.

Me to Lacey:  Finish your snack.  Remember, you have homework. 

Me to Les:  What time did you say Taekwondo started?